Thursday Thirteen

Thirteen Things about Marie 1. I went over to a friend's house tonight who was hosting a get together for ladies whose husbands work together. I usually don't like these things and have been to as many of these social events as I can count on one hand. But, it was a small gathering and I actually enjoyed myself. 2. I gave away my first crochet item as a gift at this gathering. It went over well, or so they seemed to say. :) 3. My girls have decided that sleeping through the night is optional. Erin has been having nightmares about gorillas (damn Spongebob) and Cailyn, well, I don't know what her deal is. All I know is that it makes me pretty uninterested in getting up in the morning. 4. T-minus 7 days and counting until our vacation. 5. I bought my Christmas cards today. The plan is to have them out by Dec 1. Yes, I will do it! 6. Been having a lot of dreams about when I was a kid--or at least people and places from my youth. No idea what the hell they mean. 7. I've been thinking of redecorating the living room and the master bedroom--a lot. Have no idea where to start or what I'm doing, yet. 8. Got my contract for Toy Shop magazine in the mail. Will be seeing my name in print in a national mag within the next few months. 9. In spite of that, I've had nibbles on a few short-term freelance projects. I send my credentials and a quote and NOTHING. Waiting really sucks. 10. It seems like no matter how much I want to go to bed early, 11 o'clock seems to be the earliest my ass hits the bed. 11. No wonder why I'm tired in the morning 12. One of my friends is pregnant and I am thrilled for her. She's been waiting so long for this. I keep her in my prayers every day, even though she and I aren't close friends. I sometimes wish that we could get past whatever it is that holds us back from being better friends. 13. I wonder sometimes if I'm too particular when it comes to friends. Maybe I'm stuck up or something. I don't feel I am; I think my personality tends to push people away--that and the fact that I'm so busy....maybe I can work on that, though... Links to other Thursday Thirteens! 1. (leave your link in comments, I’ll add you here!)

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

My 100 things

After doing my first Thursday Thirteen yesterday, I've become motivated to finally do my "100 things" meme...I've put it off for a long time, but I guess it's time to give it a shot. Marie's 100 Things...

1. I was born in the Bronx, NY

2. I lived in Yonkers, NY until I was 14, when my mom and dad moved to VT to get me out of the city.

3. I'm glad that we moved, although I think there will always be a part of me that is a "city girl".

4. I've always been a person who has very few friends, but the ones I do have are incredibly special to me and I'd do almost anything for.

5. However, there were times when I was a kid that just for a few moments, I could see what it was like to be popular.

6. I loved school as a kid--still do, in some ways. (No wonder why I wasn't popular! LOL)

7. From the time I was about 6 or 7, I wanted to be a teacher.

8. I followed my childhood dream and got my teaching degree.

9. I never thought I'd leave teaching after only 5 years of full time work and only 10 years after getting my degree

10. Teaching is never what anyone thinks it is--even those who studied it in school. It's emotionally and psychologically draining--and so little about it has to do with actual instruction anymore--especially in the high schools, where I was at.

11. Even though I haven't lived in VT for 10 years, I still call it "home".

12. My father died when I was 23--two weeks shy of my college graduation.

13. Dad was an alcoholic.

14. This is why I rarely drink. I see what it did to him and my family--totally not worth it for me.

15. I have addictive tendencies (i.e. food), so drinking seems too risky for me.

16. As much as I miss my dad and as sad as I was when he passed away, there is a part of me that is...dare I say it...relieved for what happened. Dad's death gave my mom and I a chance to start over, in a way.

17. I still feel kinda guilty for that train of thought, though.

18. I've been married for 9 years--and this year has been the hardest by far. I'm pretty sure once we hit 10 years in July, it will feel like a major accomplishment. Marriage is work, no matter how long you've been together!

19. I didn't plan on getting married until I was 30...Jon changed that plan ;) He's the love of my life.

20. I didn't plan on becoming a mom until after I was married for 5 years...that plan changed, too! LOL

21. I thought it would be hard for me to have kids--WRONG---talk about Fertile Mertyl!

22. I've suffered through 2 ectopic pregnancies. I feel blessed every day that I'm still here and that I have two beautiful daughters in spite of my losses.

23. My family means the world to me, even when they drive me crazy sometimes.

24. I worry sometimes that I relate to one of my daughters more than the other...and what kind of impact that may have on my relationship with the other...

25. The past few months have been a huge struggle for me, as my best friend moved out of state. (see #4). I've felt a bit lost and out of sync.

26. I love the fact that I can call myself a writer.

27. It also scares me, too.

28. My favorite show is The West Wing--even though it is no where near the caliber it once was in its glory days (1999-2001)

29. My mom is one of my best friends. We've been through so much together and our bond is very strong.

30. I still worry about pleasing my mom and disappointing her--all the time.

31. I used to be a ballroom dancer, and a pretty good one, before I had kids.

32. I miss dancing like that, even after 7 years of being away from it.

33. I'm a weather and news junkie

34. I'm a Pisces.

35. I like my eyes

36. I think that I'm a pretty good writer--but sometimes am very afraid of sharing my work with others. Yeah, fear of rejection, I guess.

37. I'm not a great housekeeper, but I'm getting better at it!

38. I'm a decent cook, but love going out to eat.

39. I like to travel.

40. Well, I like to visit places--the travel part isn't so much fun.

41. Two of my favorite places to visit are Quebec City and Disney World.

42. I've never been to Europe and really don't care about that.

43. I might want to visit Ireland one day, to see where my dad's family came from.

44. I don't feel like I take enough time for myself most weeks

45. I still love watching Little House on the Prairie (it's on in the background right now!)

46. Fall is my favorite season

47. I looove italian food.

48. Chocolate ain't so bad, either.

49. I've always had a self-image problem. I don't know why. Really had no reason to...

50. There are times I wish I lived closer to my family.

51. I'm starting to think more about moving--and I'm sure it won't be closer to my family :(

52. There's a book inside of me just waiting to get out. I just need to give it the right key.

53. I was diagnosed as clincially depressed last year.

54. I've been on meds since then, and am having more good days than bad. I still struggle sometimes, though.

55. I've recently started to crochet.

56. I'm not crafty at all, so imagine my surprise that I'm doing ok with it.

57. My music tastes range widely--My iPod holds everything from classical, jazz, showtunes, hip-hop, oldies, disco, country, rap, 80s...you name it, it's on there.

58. I need a vacation really badly--14 days and counting!

59. I'm a little stressed, though, with our upcoming vacation. Travelling with two kids on a plane. A first for us.

60. I dream of winning the lottery, so that I wouldn't worry so much about money all the time.

61. I won 15 dollars in Powerball yesterday--dreams have gotta start somewhere, right?

62. I'm really looking forward to the holidays this year.

63. My favorite color is teal

64. I don't consider myself a morning person, but notice that when I get up a bit earlier than usual, I'm much more productive during the day.

65. I'm teaching myself html.

66. I'm also working on learning more about my digital camera and photography. Lots of reading, lots of picture taking.

67. I've been trying to grow my hair out for months--and I'll probably wind up chopping it all off again because my hair is too damn frizzy!

68. My dream house is a large ranch house--with everything on one floor.

69. I love my current house, but wouldn't mind redecorating some of the rooms.

70. Martha Stewart I am not, though--see #56. So, it's little bits at a time...

71. I have a goal to write 50,000 words next month.

72. I spoil myself by going to get a massage and/or facial. I'm not a girlie-girl at all, but looove being pampered.

73. I'm almost 35 and proud of it!

74. I bite my nails. I've tried to stop--hasn't worked so far.

75. My girls bite their nails and I'm trying to get them to stop, too.

76. I enjoy watching some of the silly shows my daughters watch on Nickelodeon (i.e. Drake and Josh).

77. Day lilies are my favorite flowers.

78. I enjoy Twinkies every now and then....another guilty pleasure.

79. I'm laughing at Spongebob right now. OMG, I think I've sunk to a new low.

80. I love playing video games.

81. I especially love beating Jon when playing video games.

82. Have I mentioned that I am competitive? ;)

83. I've been on an orange juice kick lately. Yummy!

84. Pizza is a food sent from the Gods.

85. Speaking of God, I'm a Roman Catholic

86. Although, I wonder sometimes if I'm in the right "religion" or if there is even such a thing.

87. I believe in God and in Jesus Christ, but there's so much I don't get about my faith.

88. The whole confession thing...I don't need a middle man to let God know I screwed up. And saying a few prayers ain't gonna make things better. I gotta take responsibility and take action for the wrongs I've committed against myself, others and God.

89. This will probably cause some interesting conflicts since Cailyn is preparing for her first confession in December. How will I answer her questions? Will I go to confession to support her?

90. Also, the decree against birth control? (*laughing hysterically*)

91. Despite my questions, I have always been fascinated with the Bible and what God's word can teach me about myself, Him and Jesus.

92. I wish I read more than I do. I read very quickly, which annoys Jon no end--but I still don't find myself reading the way I did before I had kids.

93. Jon says that I need to put in that I'm "Ultrasexy"...so, please tell him I did, ok?

94. I'm actually a little miffed that Jon read The DaVinci Code before I got to it (I promised that I'd finish last month's book club book first).

95. My favorite drink: ice cold milk

96: Frozen Mudslides are good, too! (that, along with frozen raspberry daquiri's are what I make exceptions to drinking for).

97. I didn't get my driver's license until I was 20 years old!

98. I once had a lead role in the musical "Oliver!"--as Fagin (who is very much a male!) Actually had to tape down my developing chest at the time. What artists won't do for their art, huh?

99. After almost a 10-year hiatus, I'm going to be back on the stage in about 4 weeks in "Oklahoma". I'll be playing Aunt Eller.

100. My favorite saying when things get tense: "It just doesn't matter!"

*New!* Thursday Thirteen

Thirteen Things about ME The ol' body has finally said "Gimme a break". I've come down with a lovely head cold. Compounded with the yearly bout of seasonal allergies/asthma and my monthly visitor, this week has been a bummer. Feeling better today, but have basically done nothing...which makes me feel on edge. I am participating in the 2005 NaNoWriMo competition. (you'll see the neat little icon under my profile). What is NaNoWriMo? I think it's another word for insanity, but, in reality it's a group of people who sign up to commit to writing 50,000 in a month. Yes, you read that correctly--50,000 words. I have no assignments due in November, so I thought this might be a good way for me to just say "to hell with my perfectionism--JUST WRITE, DAMN IT!". I'm not sure how I'm gonna make the goal, since I'm on vacation the first week and have musical performances in the second week, but I'm going for it. Interested in finding out more about this crazy adventure? Click on this link www.nanowrimo.org Two weeks from today, I'll be getting ready to pick the family up for our overnight trip to Boston and then on to Orlando, FL early the next day out of Logan. Cailyn has packed already (I'm afraid to see what's in her suitcase). I have my lists, but haven't started packing just yet. The goal: pack lightly and leave the kitchen sink at home LOL I'm 5 foot, 6 inches tall I have red hair--and the disposition that goes with it--sometimes...Used to hate my hair color, but now I love it. Although, the natural curls are a mixed blessing. Fall is my favorite season. "Sweater weather" I like to call it. As one who hates extreme heat and extreme cold, this time of year is ideal!!! Been having strange dreams about babies lately. NO NO--I'm not pregnant nor do I want another one--besides, Jon and I have officially removed ourselves from the gene pool. We have two healthy girls and after losing to pgs, well...I don't see the need to risk my life..Besides, the two I have are plenty of handful for us. So, been trying to figure out what the hell this dream means.. I have plans to make some of my Xmas gifts this year, but can't seem to get any of the crochet projects started correctly--having to pull out the rows. Probably due to lack of attention, I'm sure... My favorite color is teal--has been forever, I think... I'm going to be 35 in March and I have no fear or shame in it. However, I am noticing more lines and quite a bit more grey hair...which is NOT fun. My daughters are showing excellent taste in music. As I drove them to swim lessons at the YWCA yesterday, I had my iPod plugged into my car stereo. Queen's "We Will Rock You/We are the Champions" came on and there are my two princesses in the back seat, fists in the air and singing right along. ;) No bubblegum teenybop stuff for them---ok, well, they like Britney Spears' Baby One More Time (which is also on my iPod *ducks for cover* A guilty pleasure; I confess!) I'm having a craving for chinese food--Thursdays seem to be the day that we order chinese--don't know why. At first it was just a coincidence we noticed back when Jon and I were without kids...Since the kids, we haven't done it as much, but every once in a while, the mood will strike--and it's always on a Thursday. Weird. I drive a Grand-Am. Used to have a Mini-Van, but when the time came to get a newer car, I decided I wanted a car that I could still take the kids in, but look kinda cool in, too. Shallow, yep...but, I love my ride. Now, if I could only get the kids to stop filling it up with their crap! Links to other Thursday Thirteens! 1. Momma K's 13 2. Distant Shore's 13 (leave your link in comments, I’ll add you here!)

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here! The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

New study re-ignites debate over child care - Nightly News with Brian Williams - MSNBC.com

New study re-ignites debate over child care - Nightly News with Brian Williams - MSNBC.com The child care debate rages on and I have to start wondering what the real purpose behind all of this is. According to experts (whatever that is), the best interest of the children are at the core of this battle. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for that. I'm even willing to go so far as to say that many of the results from studies such as the one mentioned above are worthwhile. Ultimately, though, what comes out of studies like this is further backlash against working moms--and this is what pisses me off no end. To reduce study results down to the level where people can't point fingers and say, "This is what causes kids to have problems" tries to tie a complicated issue into a nice, neat little package. If only we could point to one (or even just a few things) and say, "THIS" is what has the greatest impact on our children, parents across the world would rejoice and declare a national holiday. Unfortunately, that's never going to happen, because we're talking about people here, who come from a variety of backgrounds and family situations. There is no way to find one or just a few common denominators. Childcare has become a necessity. Many (if not most) parents put their kids in child care because they have to, not because they want to kick back and let someone else raise their kids. In today's economic climate, a two income family has changed from a luxury to the only way many of them can afford to keep a roof over their heads, food on the table and clothes on their back. The effects of childcare should be studied--as a parent, I want to know what the system is doing, overall, to look out for the welfare of my child. However, those results should not be swung back at me to make me feel like I'm breaking the first commandment of good parenting. The results should be studied by parents, teachers and those in the government to see how the childcare system can be improved and what ways can be implemented to better support parents and teachers of children who are in our care. I am a parent who has had the fortune of seeing both sides of this issue: Cailyn is the product of being in daycare full time until she went to school. Erin was in day cares off and on for a while, and then I stayed home with her until she started preschool this year. I can use Cailyn as an example of how to disprove many of the assertions made in this study. At the risk of sounding like a biased mom, I won't go into all of them. The bottom line is that, for Cailyn, daycare was a blessing. She got to interact with children her own age, got to know other adults in her life besides her father and myself, began to understand structure and rules in a group setting and had opportunities to go places and see things that I probably wouldn't have had the chance to share with her. Erin had a hard time fitting into her first daycare, but once we found the right place for her, she blossomed as well. Currently, she is in full time preschool and adores it. Every child is different, just as every day care is different. A good match is hard to find, and that is our responsiblity, as parents, to really go out there and do the research if a child has to go into daycare. Finding a good match could possibly alleviate a number of the problems cited in this study. Better funding (especially where government mandates are concerned), and more community and family involvement are other potential solutions. These are the things that should be addressed. Instead, many areas of the media and various child experts would rather focus on the results only and stress how bad it is for kids to be in daycare. Yes, there are problems, but they aren't with the parents who have to rely on others to help care of their children while they work to pay the bills. Our problem is much larger than that: it's a society that finds it easier to make judgements than find solutions.

What's going on in 5 minutes or less

Before I blow out the door to head to my daughter's classroom for volunteering, I thought I'd give a brief update on how life in Maine has been going. Since it's been a while since my last post, it will come as little surprise that things have been busy. 1. Jon was called out of town--again!--for training in Cinci. Girls and I are enjoying our "Mom and Daughters week". He'll be returning late Friday night. 2. My new theme song should be "On the Road Again" (if you're reading this, Mom, I know I'm stealing it from you, but too bad!!! LOL). Between volunteering at Cailyn's school, lessons for the girls (swim/gymnastics), musical rehearsal for me and travel for work, I seem to be out of the house more than in it lately. 3. Despite the fact that we're never home, the house still seems to get and stay messy. Incredible...and unfair, really. 4. I'm working on a plan to rid the house of the junk that makes it messy...and blowing up the place isn't it (my insurance company wouldn't take too kindly to that...). There are millions of people who keep a great looking house--just wish that I could, too. 5. The TV experiment keeps on going! Weekends are pretty much a free-for-all, but even then, the kids are watching less of it. The weekdays are still going well: then again, we're not home very much during the week, so that is a huge help to me! LOL 6. Got an email last night from the editor of Toy Shop magazine, whom I queried about publishing a reprint of an article I wrote on a miniature toy soldier collector here in Freeport. He loved the story and has accepted my proposal. All that's left is signing the contract, taking a few pictures of my subject and his collection and sending it in!! My first "national magazine" and from what I can see, it has a substantial following, too. I'm tapping on the glass ceiling of magazines, folks. 7. Will be pretty busy for the paper over the next few weeks/months. Re-starting my gaming series, which is what I won my award for a few weeks ago. Between that and special sections, I should have work through the holidays. 8. I do plan on submitting a short story to a contest in December...no luck on my last contest entry, but that won't stop me. 9. I've gone past my five minute mark, but actually sitting down to write feels pretty good, so I think I'll keep going! LOL 10. We're leaving for Orlando in 3 weeks! I cannot wait!! More details on that, soon! Ok, I do need to go...I have to be at the school in 10 minutes! Until later, me